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Kayfabe Rankings 7/17/14

19 Jul

Click here to see how the Kayfabe Ranking is decided

 

It's week #4 and I'm still at this thing! Russia and USA were mad about something. Orton & Kane are Plan A and 1-A, Rollins is Plan B, Heyman has Plan C, Sandown with the original briefcase is Plan Z and The Rock returning and getting his Wrestlemania WWE Title rematch is Plan [Last Letter of Every Alphabet]. Speaking of returning, last Friday saw the return of one of the biggest stars in the world of sports. Funny enough, when I looked at my kayfabe mailbag this week, I received a letter from that said superstar:

 

Dear Tope,

After four long years, I'm going back home. While I was in Miami, that city saw such great moments as Orton/Bryan Hell In A Cell with HBK as the guest ref....John Cena getting fired by the Nexus....The Rock's birthday party....Brock Lesnar returning after nearly a decade....and of course Once In a Lifetime, End of An Era and Wrestlemania 28 (to name a few). What's been going on in Cleveland over the last 4 years?

-Love LeBron from Northeast Ohio


Great question, LeBron. Miami (and Florida in general) has always been a hot bed for wrestling and the WWE for the longest time now. Great moments in Cleveland in the last four years include:

  • The first sign of Wyatts vs Shield
  • Daniel Bryan being stripped of the WWE title
  • Cena vs Kane stretcher match,
  • Miz vs Ziggler in 'The Battle of Cleveland',
  • The Rock Concert/Cena Rap
  • James Roday (You know...the guy from Psych...Psych?....On USA....never mind)
  • Hugh Jackson making Zack Ryder the main event star we see today (a la Tyson/Austin)
  • Awesome Truth fired (because that existed)
  • And oh yeah, a thing called THE MIZ'S DAD

 

So to answer your question, Miz's Dad. And now I'm off to Youtube to watch 37,000 'I'm Coming Home' Lebron James videos. Let's go to the rankings!

 


 


Kayfabe Rankings (Through 7/17/14)

 

1 2 3 4 5


Bottom 5:

25) Sin Cara

26) R-Truth

27) Jack Swagger

28) Damien Sandow

29) Titus O'Neil

 

FACTS/NOTES OF THE WEEK:

  • Biggest Winner! Alberto Del Rio (#16; most points gained this week) reminded everyone this week that Albero Del Rio is a professional wrestler in WWE (he is, I double checked). The former MITB/WWE Champ/WHC Champ/MITB/Royal Rumble Winner/Whatever-Else-I-Missed had his first Raw/Smackdown combo wins of the year this week.
  • Biggest Loser! Cesaro (#6) is currently on a 4 black guy losing streak with his loss to Big E (#5) this week. In the last month, no one has done more for black wrestlers than Cesaro since Bill Watts (that's a direct quote from Bill Watts)
  • Kofi Kingston (#24) moved up one spot for the third straight week, even with a loss this week. At his rapidly growing pace, Kofi Kingston will catch up to Rusev on Dec 27th, 2014. No one tell Randy Orton!
  • Rusev (#1) was a victim of the 'easiest schedule' penalty after Big E wrestled highly ranked Cesaro this week and Rusev yelled at ugly Americas. Good news for Rusev is that his next match will be against highly ranked Jack Swagger (#27) at Battleground!
  • Dean Ambrose (#18) is 1-5 in decision matches this year all on Raw or Smackdown. A win against Seth Rollins at Battleground would likely put him in the Top 12. NO PRESSURE DEAN!
  • SANDOW (#29) STILL ISN'T LAST!!!!!!!!!

*Note: A win is roughly +3 points to your KPI while a loss is roughly -2 points.

CLICK HERE TO SEE FULL RANKINGS HERE

 

Tope Adebanjo

Tope Adebanjo

Been Watching Since: 1999

Favorite Wrestler, currently: Daniel Bryan

Favorite Wrestler of All Time: Edge

Least Favorite Wrestler, currently: N/A

                                       Least Favorite Wrestler of All Time: Goldberg

                                       Guilty Pleasure: Willow

                                       Catchphrase: "[Insert PPV Here] is gonna..."

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